Thursday, March 26, 2009
Saturday, March 21, 2009
In the commercial, the following conversations ensue:
Emily: "I feel like I'm a horrible mother."
Jane: "I screw up all the time. I ran out of diapers two days ago and we've been using paper towels and tape."
Jane: "Emily, you are good mother."
Emily: "Thank you Jane and you ... have beautiful hair."
Supposedly, these are from real life stories, and looks to be a hilarious show. So, now I don't feel that bad about some of the things I do!
Thursday, March 19, 2009
I have been called many things in my life, some of them warranted, however, I have recently been called a cougar by my "friends" and you know who you are!! :)
I looked up cougar online and was met with the definition you would expect from Wikipedia, but once I went on the urban dictionary site (not a site for the faint hearted), I found what I was looking for.
Wikipedia: The cougar (Puma concolor), also puma, mountain lion, or panther, depending on region, is a mammal of the Felidae family, native to the Americas. This large, solitary cat has the greatest range of any wild terrestrial mammal in the Western Hemisphere, extending from Yukon in Canada to the southern Andes of South America. An adaptable, generalist species, the cougar is found in every major American habitat type. It is the second heaviest cat in the American continents after the jaguar, and the fourth heaviest in the world, along with the leopard, after the tiger, lion, and jaguar, although it is most closely related to smaller felines.
1. An older woman who frequents clubs in order to score with a much younger man. The cougar can be anyone from an overly surgically altered wind tunnel victim, to an absolute sad and bloated old horn-meister, to a real hottie or milf. Cougars are gaining in popularity -- particularly the true hotties -- as young men find not only a sexual high, but many times a chick with her shit together.
2. (see also hunt, prowl, corner, pounce). Noun. A 35+ year old female who is on the "hunt" for a much younger, energetic, willing-to-do-anything male. The cougar can frequently be seen in a padded bra, cleavage exposed, propped up against a swanky bar in San Francisco (or other cities)waiting, watching, calculating; gearing up to sink her claws into an innocent young and strapping buck who happens to cross her path. "Man is cougar's number one prey"
Millions of them. More famously, Demi and Ashton, Naomi Watts and Heath Ledger, Joan Collins and her hubby, Cameron and Justin, Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins
3. An attractive woman in her 30's or 40's who is on the hunt once again. She may be found in the usual hunting grounds: nightclubs, bars, beaches, etc. She will not play the usual B.S. games that women in their early twenties participate in. End state, she will be going for the kill, just like you.
Like most friends, I hope mine think highly of me, but I'd like to point out the following facts:
1. I do not, nor ever have "frequented night clubs in order to score with much younger men". The one and (almost) only time, I went to a "club" (funny, we used to call them bars) I was appalled with most of what was going on. Not to mention, I almost asked a row of (and I use the term lightly) gentlemen if they would like to inspect my teeth since they were looking at my friends and me like horse meat.
2. After two kids I would not call myself a "hottie", nor have I been overly surgically altered, but do my friends really consider me "an absolute sad and bloated old horn-meister".
3. I like the second definition much better, even though I would hurt myself and others if I was "seen in a padded bra, cleavage exposed, propped up against a swanky bar in San Francisco". And being compared to Demi is not something I am opposed to.
4. The third definition is my favorite, however, nightclubs and bars are not my scene, and beaches......well, that is the subject for another blog.
So I need to ask again, do my "friends" really think of me as a cougar, or are they just trying to compliment me???????